What the Duck? (The List)

What the Duck? (The List)

What did the duck say when she was buying lipstick?

“Put it on my bill.”

The duck said, “put it on my bill.”

We are obligated in this life to consider so many things. My contention, as described by countless others, is there is only fear or love. Fear creates responses and attitudes that can be defined. Love also, can create responses and attitudes which can be easily known.

How much are we obligated to chase rabbits down rabbit holes? What are we to do with the worry and concern of others? Also, what shall we do with the fear that lives in the corners of our minds?

There are simple things we can do. Simple responses to very complex issues and experience.

We can breathe.

A few deep breaths in a way that we appreciate each breath helps us to appreciate other things more. We pause our minds from anxious thoughts and we take a minute to express gratitude. That expression of gratitude might be to universe, Source, God, family members, or even to yourself.

The key is gratitude, no matter how or where it is expressed. Breath helps us get there.


Watching a video of a comedian, thinking back on a time when you could not stop laughing, or even telling a joke you know is likely not all that funny, will help. Whatever makes you laugh in a way that promotes goodness. We might even think back on a moment when we are now able to laugh at ourselves.

Humor and laughter help us to be present, in this moment.

We can smile.

Smiling is a forgotten tonic of the gods. Smiling tells our physical body that we are happy and then our physical body conveys that message to our minds. We may not currently have a reason to smile, but we can always smile. It is not that we have to smile all of the time, but it is that we can smile in the face of worrisome events.

Smiling helps us perceive things differently. Not always in ways that make sense to our minds, but from different perspectives.


What I am calling an anchor, Tich Naht Hahn called a bell of mindfulness. The secret here, is for you to spend five minutes a day and define what it means when you notice one thing or another. Personally, when I drop something, as I bend over to retrieve it, I am thankful for abundance. When I stub my toe (which happens often), I consider myself a blessing to others. When I hear a sneeze from animals or humans, I associate that with Source blessing me.

Anchors help turn common events into reminders of how we wish to see the world.

This is a short list. Though short, it may help someone. And this is one of the things that I do to deal with the fear in my mind. I create a drawing or an article, which might help someone.

Now the good news is this. Everything exists in our mind. Everything we experience is experienced through the filter of the stories we tell, the actions we take, and the way we have reacted in the past. We can change all three of those things in order to help shape how we experience future events.

Hypnosis helps me. Studying new things helps me. Even doing kind things and keeping them as a secret from every other human being helps me.

What helps me the most?

Starting with the premise that everything is love. Even fear is just a response to love in a negative way. We will not survive, or solve problems, with illusion. Nothing about what is going on in the world will be solved by anything on this “what the duck” list. But, it might better prepare us to survive, and solve problems.

I recommend following conspiracies and studying spiritual thinkers. I recommend also, spending time in the sun, without a care in the world, and smoking a good cigar. Spirituality should never be confused with morality. Henry David Thoreau said it best when he wrote, “Do not be too moral. You may cheat yourself out of much life so. Aim above morality. Be not simply good; be good for something.”

Also, tell a dad joke every now and then. Pick one you laugh at every time you tell it, regardless of who finds it funny. This has worked so well for me, that several of my friends or new acquaintances, have begun telling me dad jokes they have heard, as if they were some treasure. Even if I have heard them, I let them enjoy telling them in their own way.

And is not all of life and spirituality just one big dad joke?

I have heard that by listening to others, we help them rid themselves of their karma. My specialty is not karma, but I do understand it is important for people to be heard. So listen, also, with the assumption that the stories you hear are true and need no further commentary. We may very well heal the world this way.

Be easy with yourself and others. Be as thankful for the “you” that is you, as you are thankful for the blessings of the creator. The creator is this thankful for you also.

“Put it on my bill”, get it? It could either be her face or her invoice…

Happy Friday.


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